Happy Birthday Culuket


Happy Birthday Culuket

Happy Birthday Culuket

Video Greetings For One Super Special Guy  (Updated: Gifts Galore!)

We pride ourselves on having learned good manners from our mothers, so we are here today to extend hearty birthday wishes. And besides, birthdays are such a great excuse to throw a party or get snippy.

Now, what makes this occasion so special is its not for an actual person, but rather a persona whom looms very large over this case.

For our new readers, police documents released late last year revealed that ‘Culuket’ is an email address and screen name used by defendant Joe Price for communications that were of a sexual and non-sexual nature.

Culuket hosted a profile page on ALT.com, a sexual fetish website, to search for additional sexual partners. Culuket lists his birthday, September 30, 1971, along with a large number of his other well-defined interests on the page.  So, happy 38th birthday Culuket!

Joe Price’s birthday is actually March 30, 1971, so he is 6 months older than his persona.  But, seriously, who’s counting?

This profile page is interesting because of the list of activities that Culuket seems to enjoy when retiring to his boudoir. 

What ‘s doubly interesting is that the activities enjoyed by Culuket and his dom, one Dylan Ward, could have come into play the night Robert Wone was murdered.  

The prosecution firmly believes that Robert Wone was sexually assaulted while being incapacitated before he was murdered.  To help prove this theory,  they are working to have Culuket’s page entered as evidence. 

Are we bringing you down?  We didn’t mean to, especially since today is such a festive occasion. 

Please join us in watching our birthday gift to a very special guy – Happy Birthday Culuket – the video.

 We’re certain that Culuket would love to receive birthday greetings from all his friends today.  Send an electronic greeting card his way at culuket@yahoo.com, and please copy us, we would love to post your birthday greetings for all to see!


Bottoms up!!

Birthday Greetings from the P.R.C. Wanker

Joe, We Give You a Very Special Salute; From China on Your Very Special Day


Culu Oink

As we take “stock” of you on your birthday, Not only has the pig become so big, So have the size of its lies.



Culu Bake

— Posted by David


29 comments for “Happy Birthday Culuket

  1. one more friend
    09/30/2009 at 12:34 PM

    I sent him a birthday card to the yahoo address. It hasn’t bounced back. He’s probably happy we have him in our thoughts.

    Nice work. But scary

  2. Nick
    09/30/2009 at 12:35 PM

    I just saw on 48 Hours Mystery that the Craigslist killer had an alt.com profile too.

  3. one more friend
    09/30/2009 at 5:23 PM

    I wonder if we’ll see them at Halo tonight… They like to party on Wednesday nights apparently.

    • John Grisham
      10/03/2009 at 10:23 PM

      Did you see them there? Or perhaps the Easy-Bake was on the blink.

  4. 09/30/2009 at 7:42 PM


    This post was a home run! Congrats – and happy birthday to Culuket. I hope dear Aunt Marcia fires up that easy bake — with a nail file in the cake of course.

    I am wondering if a certain dom doesn’t feel “extra” blue this time of year when the seasons change: word on the street is that the loss of daylight has exponetial effects on those with emotional/mental health issues. Fall can be a time of anxiety.

    Love to all – and best on this day.

  5. Clio
    09/30/2009 at 11:15 PM

    Kudos, Culuket! At one time, only gay men and women had bar names, and I guess that now we have all progressed to screen names, which do reveal a glimpse of our interests and characters. In your case, that all-too-revealing moniker may erase all of Bernie’s best-laid and best-paid plans. In one instant, when your profile may be admitted as evidence, all of that mortgage money may be wasted: your parents may be ruined financially for one last moment of exquisite humiliation, thrill, and “torture.” Was it worth it? Probably NOT. Unfortunately for you, your inventive coining of a new word may cost you your freedom: it’s literally the catalyst that may define the eventual verdicts.

    Accordingly, since this may be your last “birthday,” however contrived for the Web, as a free man, may you savor it, in the same gluttonous way in which you are apparently devouring Aunt Martha’s cooking. Be sure to give Mr. Ward and your other “room mates” our love. XO, Clio.

    • Clio
      10/01/2009 at 7:10 AM

      Oops! The post above should read Aunt Marcia, not Aunt Martha; I extend my apologies to the enabler-in-chief!

  6. Bea
    10/01/2009 at 12:23 AM

    FROM: groups.yahoo.com/group/DupontForum/messages/2386

    Shows our dear birthday boy liked to play with identity by using his Culuket email address to discuss sidewalks in Dupont on August 4, 2008. And sent from his Blackberry – must know how to operate them – wonder if he waited to send this one too.

    Re: [DupontForum] WASA, Brick sidewalks, and asphalt patches

    The 1400 and 1500 blocks of Swann Street are gpood examples of this. In at least one case, only a week after the brick sidewalks were installed, they were promptly torn up and “repaired” with an ugly asphalt patch.

    Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

    Unwrap Lines
    Offline Offline
    Send Email Send Email

    • Clio
      10/01/2009 at 9:38 AM

      Brick sidewalks versus asphalt patches, indeed! Culuket may be seeing much more of the latter in the yard of the gated community to which he’ll be moving next year, I am afraid.

      • 10/01/2009 at 10:49 AM

        Lol! And he might even be on a chain gang tearing up some pavement.

        • Craig
          10/01/2009 at 11:26 AM

          It bears repeating that the 1500 block of Swann Street is one of the nicest in Dupont, or all of downtown DC for that matter.

          For the out-of-towners who’ve only seen still pics of the home, we plan to have a walking-tour of the block and area produced in the next couple of weeks.

          • Clio
            10/03/2009 at 5:46 PM

            Great! Maybe, Sarah could serve as one of the walking tour’s docents in part because she may know the pedestrian shortcuts of the neighborhood very well.

            At any rate, Editors, be sure to invite Aunt Marcia, Needham and Di, and the other Boomer parents of the trouple to the walking tour’s inaugural session. I’m sure that they’re just as curious as anyone else about the Swann and its urban landscape.

          • John Grisham
            10/03/2009 at 6:18 PM

            One can hope that this walking tour includes a shopping stop at Go Mamma Go (just a couple blocks away). I hear its a good place to order replacement knives if someone’s sets happen to be in need of some.

            • Clio
              10/04/2009 at 11:39 PM

              Good thinking as usual, John.

              Is the younger Mr. Price still employed there? If so, perhaps, he may be able to secure permission to give to the tour group members discounts on knives, door chimes, spiders on the light for Halloween, and other “boutique” items relevant to the investigation.

  7. corgivet
    10/01/2009 at 7:30 PM

    omg…How did I miss the Easy Bake Meth Lab….
    “price” less…..sorry for the horrific pun:)

    • 10/01/2009 at 7:45 PM

      no such thing as a horrofic pun.

      still smiling at the enabler-in-chief reference.

      would oskar be ashamed?

      • Clio
        10/04/2009 at 12:05 PM


        And, I do wonder how this tawdry scandal is playing in Oklahoma, Victor’s home state? Thanks to the astonishing lack of media coverage, do they even know about it? Is Aunt Marcia giving her Okie in-laws any inkling of the present-day emotional states of the defendants, let alone of the damning details of the affadavits?

        And, if the Okies do know a little about the case, does it merely confirm “fly-over” country’s view of DC as an unredeemed Sodom on the Potomac, or have the Okie relatives rallied to their native son’s defense against what they consider “partisan” attacks?

        • Bea
          10/04/2009 at 1:18 PM

          I think the stop in Oklahoma was during Victor’s high school and college years only, that the family was from “the East coast” and returned there. Pennsylvania, I think, but am not sure from my Googling.

          • Bea
            10/04/2009 at 1:20 PM

            But, Clio, I agree that it would be great to hear more from the fraternity brothers/former boyfriends of Victor’s from that era – of course, even better, his family, close and distant. We did have someone post who’d been Victor’s boyfriend during that time – wish he’d return.

            • Clio
              10/04/2009 at 8:01 PM

              True, Bea, about the seemingly tenuous nature of Victor’s attachments to Oklahoma, but I had thought that that particular poster from the Tulsa area was a woman who had dated Victor before he identified as gay. At any rate, we all do need more background information on Mr. Zaborsky, if we are to consider John Grisham’s tantalizing idea of Victor being the really bossy bottom of 1509 Swann, the actor AND writer of the 911 script.

              In Joe’s appeal letter for his defense fund last fall, he admitted that many friends and family members of the trouple may not have heard from Victor, Joe, or Dylan in some time. That admission may explain the silences from relatives, friends, and associates of all three. Financial support from elderly parents, a place to crash from Aunt Marcia, and brotherly hugs from Michael, to me, display more pity for their Three Stooges than any real, vocal support for the intruder theory.

              • Craig
                10/04/2009 at 8:30 PM

                Clio – I’ll see if I can dig up the Tulsa comment. I don’t recall reading it.

                • Clio
                  10/04/2009 at 10:00 PM

                  See Karen Walker’s posts from June 11 and 13 on “We Need An Ambulance,” from June 10.

                  As Victor’s own Walker, please come back, Karen!

                  • Bea
                    10/04/2009 at 10:21 PM

                    Come on back, Karen! I think ‘Karen’ was male for some reason, as in an early boyfriend of Victor’s, but I may have read it wrong. I would love to know – as we all would – what really happened that night, but can’t wrap my head around John’s theory of Victor being the mastermind/architect, whether it’s of the murder, the cover-up, or whatever. Joe wouldn’t play second fiddle in any situation – and the maestro of the orchestra had Victor calling the cops (knowing he’d do a good job, of course, and then be complicit – far better than Dylan would do).

                    • John Grisham
                      10/04/2009 at 10:45 PM

                      Joe deferred to Victor’s judgment when he (Joe) was really f**ked up. Many posting this site’s “bossy bottom” analysis are really “f**ked up” as well.

                      In a long term three-way household, power is more equally distributed than you would think.

  8. Fascinating
    10/02/2009 at 4:57 PM

    These are my least favorite types of posts here at the blog. It’s too snarky for my tastes.

    I enjoy the facts, talking about the case, theories, and, of course, new developments in the case much more.

    Just my two cents.

  9. Craig
    10/03/2009 at 3:00 PM

    Your point is taken Fascinating. We realize that some of the work that surfaces here is not to everyones’ liking.

    We’re closing in on the one-year mark of this effort and have at least eight more months to go. We assume that another 150 or so posts are expected between now and then, and it’s safe to say that some future offerings may also trend towards the unorthodox.

    As part of the Long March to and through the trial, we hope readers like yourself can either suggest or submit content.

    Love to all (as someone here says), Craig

    • 10/03/2009 at 6:29 PM

      🙂 xxoo

      • Clio
        10/03/2009 at 10:03 PM

        Editors, the only thing that I did not like about this post is the accompanying picture of the disengaged nude man in an unfurnished room. Although its unrelieved gray gloom does underscore the desperate loneliness of Culuket appropriately, the caption’s full-frontal male nudity may scare off the ladies of whatever gender (and of all sexualities.) As officer Diane Durham counseled the real Joe that fateful evening: put some clothes on! And, of course, that selected model is no longer to scale by a wide (and an increasingly wide, at that) margin.

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